DPRK Disputes “Fake News” Reports of Failure of Dung Noodle ICBM Test

A North Korean missile appeared to have exploded just after it was launched on Wednesday, the U.S. and South Korean militaries said after detecting the latest in a series of weapons tests by the nuclear-armed state that has alarmed the region.

The launch attempt was made near the city of Wonsan, on North Korea’s east coast, the same place it launched several intermediate-range missiles last year, all but one of which failed.

“U.S. Pacific Command detected what we assess was a failed North Korean missile launch attempt … in the vicinity of Kalma,” Commander Dave Benham, a spokesman for U.S. Pacific Command, said in a statement, referring to an airfield in Wonsan.

“A missile appears to have exploded within seconds of launch,” Benham said, adding that a more detailed assessment was underway.

The above statement is North Korean for “Shit the bed.”

 

 

Pyongyang: The official North Korean News Agency today issued a statement from the DPRK Ministry of Truth on the false and widely reported failure of the Nork’s latest missile test by the American Fake News Media. The test was reportedly conducted early Wednesday over the Sea of Japan.

In part the statement read:

“The valiant scientist of the the Missile Defense Forces of the Glorious Empire of the Peoples Republic of Korea today conducted a successfully test of the latest and most advanced version of the stealth ‘Dung Noodle P33’ Intercontinental Ballistic Missile.

Yep, let’s have the U.N. Security get involved with this issue.

 

The test missile was launch from a super-secret base near the city of (deleted) in the eastern territory. After a successful launch and a few seconds of glorious flight the missile’s highly advanced self-destruct circuits were initiated and successfully tested.

After four successful crash tests of the secret Musudan Missile to test structural integrity,  the DPRK Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un and the highly smart scientist of the Glorious Empire of Korea again reiterate their unwavering commitment to build the Safest Weapons of Mass Destruction the world has ever know.

 

 

BRINGING NEW MEANING TO “MAD COW DISEASE”

This most recent test also sends a clear message to the Cheeto faced Capitalist Imperial Warmongering Leader of the West of the overwhelming superiority of the DPRK’s scientific and military prowess…….”

 

Developing…….

THE END

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